You Know You Grew up in the 80’s if . . . 1. You’ve ever ended a sentence with the word “PSYCHE”. 2. You watched the Pound Puppies. 3. You can sing the rap to the “Fresh Prince of Belair” 4. You wore biker shorts under your skirts and felt stylish. 5. You yearned to be a member… Read More »
Sometimes life sucks and leaves some mean hickies Ever get one of those emails that tell you that you have to send it on to 10 of your closet friends? What about the one that tells you that you have to send it on or you’ll have bad luck? How about the one that says if you send… Read More »
Top Ten Reasons to go to Work Naked 10. Your boss is always yelling, “I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!” 9. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan. 8. Inventive way to finally meet that hottie in Human Resources. 7. “I’d love to chip in, but I left my wallet… Read More »
The Rules from a man’s point of view… Ok… in the interest of fairness, and I do try to be fair most days. This is a list of “rules” from a man’s point of view… we always hear “The Rules” from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are THE rules!… Read More »
And you thought you knew it all… 1. Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated. 2. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite. 3. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar. 4. The average person’s left hand does 56% of the typing. 5. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.… Read More »
And Yet More Politically Correct Terms. . . I’m not at all sure about all this “Politically Correct” stuff. Just because a mule looks like a horse and can work like one, it doesn’t mean that it’s not a jackass when all things get said or done. Dirty Old Man: Sexually focused chronologically gifted individual. Panhandler: Unaffiliated… Read More »
Politically Correct Terms No one fails a class anymore, he’s merely “passing impaired.” You don’t have detention, you’re just one of the”exit delayed.” Your bedroom isn’t cluttered, it’s just “passage restrictive.” These days, a student isn’t lazy. He’s “energetically declined.” Your locker isn’t overflowing with junk, it’s just “closure prohibitive.” Kids don’t get grounded anymore. They merely… Read More »
Rules for Life… 1. Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas. 2. You need only two tools. WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn’t move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn’t, use the tape. 3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship “I apologize” and “You are right.” 4. Everyone… Read More »
Actual Federal Employee Performance These quotes were taken from actual Federal Employee Performance Evaluations: 1. “Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.” 2. “I would not allow this employee to breed.” 3. “This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won’t be.” 4.… Read More »
25 Signs That You Are Grown Up… 1. Your potted plants are alive. And you can’t smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd. 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. 4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep. 5. You hear your favorite… Read More »
